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Seasons Greetings


To all our clients and visitors to our website

The Spiritual significance of the December Solstice

1st December 2019

There is so much ritual and history associated with the December Solstice.

This time of year has been celebrated for centuries in many different ways and across many different cultures, and there is no denying that even today, there is a magic that ensues this time of year.

You can feel it in the air, see it in the people, hear it in the music. This time of year evokes strong feelings for many and these feelings likely go all the way back in time.

There are two Solstices every year, one in June and one in December. Both of these represent a critical turning point in the cycle of the year.

The word Solstice means Sun standing still, as on this day we have the longest or shortest hours of light depending on whether we are in the Southern or Northern Hemisphere.

It is at this point that we enter into a new direction of energy and start moving towards a phase of completion.

It is at this time that we begin wrapping up the year. It is at this point that we start reflecting on the lessons that the cycle of the year has brought us. It is at this time that we begin shifting.

Even though we may experience a different expression of this energy depending which end of the earth we live in, the message is the same.

The December Solstice is about honouring both light and dark, celebrating the life-giving Sun, and celebrating the full expression of who we really are.

The way in which we celebrate it however, will be different depending on the signs and clues that Mother Nature brings us.

In the Northern Hemisphere, the December Solstice is a time to go within and reflect. It is a time to honour the darkness and to know that light will rise once again.

It is a time to allow the Sun, the very essence of who we are to sleep, to rest, to recharge, and to restore. It is about honouring that for the light to shine brightest, we have to venture into the dark and make peace with what we find there.

In the Northern Hemisphere, the December Solstice is very much the dark night of the soul and we experience the longest night of the year.

In the Southern Hemisphere, the December Solstice brings the longest day of the year, and is a time to let yourself shine. It is a time to express your full potential and allow your inner light to light up the world around you.

Even though these two expressions may be different, they are all helping to achieve the same purpose.

The December Solstice is about honouring that although we may experience the longest day, the darkness will come again, and although we may experience the longest night, the light will come again.

Although we see duality, everything is one and the same. We cannot perceive light unless we have seen the darkness, we cannot understand summer unless we have seen the winter. Both of these concepts need one another to be real.

There is really only one state, all else is an illusion. We are one. Light and dark are one. We are everything and nothing all at the same time.

On this 2019 December Solstice, we are reminded that no matter how dark the night, the light will always return. And no matter how light the day, the darkness will always return.

We live in a world where we can be happy one moment and sad the next. In an instant, your life can change. In an instant, you can be faced with death and pain or birth and pleasure.

We live in a world where all of these shades exists. The highs. The lows. The struggles and the victories.

And although they may appear to be separate states of being, they are part of something bigger. They are a part of wholeness.

For we come into this human state to experience all shades, all colours, and all expressions of our emotional rainbow.

We come into this human life to suffer, to thrive, to find joy, and to find pain. We come to experience it all because we know it is what makes us whole.

Honour the cycles. And know that it is not about how often you venture into the darkness or into the light, but how you allow these states to move you, to change you, to soften you, and to awaken you to wholeness, that resides within and all around.

On this Solstice find your wholeness, and know that the light and the dark are one and the same. Don’t regret the moments spent in darkness, and don’t hold on too tightly to the light. There is no dark or light, there just is. It is just one. It is just a whole. Don’t fight the darkness. Don’t fight the light. Just make peace with both these states and see them as part of something bigger and more infinite. See them as simply labels that our mind uses to make sense of the world. They are nothing more. No labels. Just be. Just be as you are and accept whatever comes your way. Use it to make you whole.

Author : Tanaaz 'Forever Conscious' 


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 Self -Care 

August 25th  2019

If you ever feel so overwhelmed that you just want to escape life?  

There’s a way to stave that off in advance by learning the best strategies to implement daily self-care.

Self-care can be many things, but today, I want to share a couple reasons why I choose to spend time in nature.


1. A Calm Mind & Steady Mood

Being in nature is proven to help reduce stress. It can help you heal more deeply, more quickly. 

It helps to feel more connected as you can get away from all the pressures of the busy world around and focus.

 “Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better,”  Albert Einstein.

2. A Fully Alive Body

Sitting at the computer all day, commuting to work, and being stuck indoors, can  takes a toll on your body.

Getting out into nature and moving around helps you in so many ways. Reducing stress  can benefit your sleep, your hormones, and your mood. It also helps your energy levels and increases your cardiovascular health.

Walking is a great gentle weight bearing exercise that most people can tolerate.

Getting out into nature is an opportunity for you to create  self-care, clear your mind, improve your mood, and rejuvenate your whole body so you can flourish.

September 28th  2019

Tuesday 1st  October sees the launch of our support and wellbeing group Surviving to Thriving, offering group therapy to the adult survivors of abuse and trauma. Our group offers 90 minutes of Psycho-Therapeutic support to includes Mindfulness Based CBT,  Creative Therapies and Psychodynamic concepts which will form  holistically orientated themes to our sessions.   Group therapy would usually form part of our client service to those attending 1-2-1 therapy, however if you are currently engaging within counselling with a therapist or would like information about the services we provide or would like to join the  group we would love to hear from you.

Accessed following a 1-2-1  consultation.                                                                                 Please contact us 

The science of Sad

Understanding the causes of ‘Winter Depression’

October 7th  2019

The darker days and colder weather can bring with them a feeling of low spirits. So, what makes people susceptible to seasonal affective disorder, and what are the best ways to treat it?

Putting the clocks back for daylight saving time can be accompanied by a distinct feeling of winter blues.

Around 80% of Sad sufferers are women, particularly those in early adulthood.

For many of us in the UK, the annual ritual of putting the clocks back for daylight saving time can be accompanied by a distinct feeling of winter blues as autumn well and truly beds in. This might be felt as a lack of energy, reduced enjoyment in activities and a need for more sleep than normal. But for around 6% of the UK population and between 2-8% of people in other higher latitude countries such as Canada, Denmark and Sweden, these symptoms are so severe that these people are unable to work or function normally. They suffer from a particular form of major depression, triggered by changes in the seasons, called seasonal affective disorder or Sad.

In addition to depressive episodes, Sad is characterised by various symptoms including chronic oversleeping and extreme carbohydrate cravings that lead to weight gain. As this is the opposite to major depressive disorder where patients suffer from disrupted sleep and loss of appetite, Sad has sometimes been mistakenly thought of as a “lighter” version of depression, but in reality it is simply a different version of the same illness.

“People who truly have Sad are just as ill as people with major depressive disorder,”

says Brenda McMahon, a psychiatry researcher at the University of Copenhagen.

“They will have non-seasonal depressive episodes, but the seasonal trigger is the most common. However it’s important to remember that this condition is a spectrum and there are a lot more people who have what we call sub-syndromal Sad.”

Around 10-15% of the population has sub-syndromal Sad. These individuals struggle through autumn and winter and suffer from many of the same symptoms but they do not have clinical depression. And in the northern hemisphere, as many as one in three of us may suffer from “winter blues” where we feel flat or uninterested in things and regularly fatigued.

One theory for why this condition exists is related to evolution. Around 80% of Sad sufferers are women, particularly those in early adulthood. In older women, the prevalence of Sad goes down and some researchers believe that this pattern is linked to the behavioural cycles of our ancient ancestors.

“Because it affects such a large proportion of the population in a mild to moderate form, a lot of people in the field do feel that Sad is a remnant from our past, relating to energy conservation,”

says Robert Levitan, a professor at the University of Toronto.

“Ten thousand years ago, during the ice age, this biological tendency to slow down during the wintertime was useful, especially for women of reproductive age because pregnancy is very energy-intensive. But now we have a 24-hour society, we’re expected to be active all the time and it’s a nuisance. However, as to why a small proportion of people experience it so severely that it’s completely disabling, we don’t know.”

Counselling can help with SAD. Learn ways to manage your symptoms and reduce the severity.

Reference: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/oct/30/sad-winter-depression-seasonal-affective-disorder 

The science of Sad: Update

Winter Depression’ 

How can you help yourself to stay well?

October 19th  2019

Putting the clocks back for daylight saving time can be accompanied by a distinct feeling of 'winter blues'. 

Learning ways to manage  and adapt your self-care to maintain and improve wellbeing over the winter, can help lessen the impact of SAD for sufferers. We cannot stop the onset of winter so perhaps putting aside negativity and  embracing the beauty of Autumn and what it has to offer may be helpful for some people. 

The earth holds a richness this time of year, there is much to observe. Wildlife are ensuring their survival in the  collecting and feasting on berries and fruits. I am currently  enjoying a squirrel scurrying along my fence, carrying a bounty of crab-apples in his mouth too and forth, he has a sense of urgency, the garden changes daily. Whilst there is a threat he will dig up newly planted bulbs, his presence and comedy is worth the risk of disruption to Spring floral displays. 

  • Practical ways to combat SAD: 
  • 1. Adapt self-care by ensuring you have some time out of doors during daylight hours.
  • 2. Using daylight bulbs or light boxes have shown to help with the disorder. (Not advisable in bedrooms as this may disrupt natural sleep hormones and rhythm).
  • 3. Wake up naturally with a 'Bodyclock Glow' available from John Lewis. Simulates a natural sunrise for boosted energy  and reduced SAD symptoms.
  • 4. Consider vitamin D intake during the winter months, (The sunshine vitamin).
  • 5. Sitting near a window when working or reading etc will allow greater expose to natural daylight.
  • 6. Increasing exercise and ensuring  your diet meets nutritional needs will help keep your mood even.
  • 7. Try to ensure you have quality sleep. The earth is recharging  its batteries over the restorative winter months; we might observe this and allow our natural rhythms need slow down.
  • 8. Stay connected, offering help to other SAD sufferers may also help you.
  • 9. Talking about why you feel the autumn triggers your low moods may identify past events or concepts around this time of year. 
  • 10. Work with a Gratitude Journal to find and focus upon the positive.

  • Be sure to check with your doctor before using light therapy due to damage to the retina with certain medications. 


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 Ways to cope with depression

July 5th 2018

  • Try to tell people who are close to you how you feel rather than 'bottling it up' and 'going alone'. It is not weak to cry or admit that you are struggling.
  • Try not to despair - most people with depression recover. It is important to remember this.
  • Do try to distract yourself by doing other things such as gentle exercise or  being creative. Try doing things that does not need much concentration, but can be distracting, such as watching TV or listening to music. TV may be useful late at night if sleeping is a problem.
  • Try to eat regularly, even if you do not feel like eating. If you are able to, eat a healthy diet.
  •  Drinking alcohol is tempting to some people with depression, as the immediate effect may seem to relieve the symptoms. However, drinking heavily is likely to make your situation worse in the long run. Also, it is very difficult either to assess or to treat depression if you are drinking a lot of alcohol.
  •  It may be tempting to give up a job or move away to solve the problem. If at all possible you should delay any major decisions about relationships, jobs, or money until you are well again.
  • Do tell your doctor if you feel that you are getting worse, particularly if suicidal thoughts are troubling you. Learn more about dealing with suicidal thoughts.
  • Sometimes a spell off work is needed. However, too long off work might not be so good, as dwelling on problems and brooding at home may make things worse. Getting back into the hurly-burly of normal life may help the healing process when things are improving. Each person is different and the ability to work will vary.
  • Sometimes a specific psychological problem can cause depression but some people are reluctant to mention it. One example is sexual abuse as a child, leading to depression or psychological difficulties as an adult. Tell your doctor if you feel something like this is the root cause of your depression. Counselling is available for such problems.

 Empty nest syndrome 

August 16th  2018 

In the simplest of terms, empty nest syndrome is grief and loneliness caused when someone moves out of your home. This can occur when a child leaves their parent’s household, or a spouse loses their partner to death or divorce. It can also take place when seniors enter retirement. This type of empty nest syndrome is the result of a change in one’s everyday environment. They are feeling a void caused when they are no longer spending most of their time in a workplace where they have social connections with coworkers and a daily routine. Empty nest syndrome is not a mental health disorder. Therefore, you cannot receive a clinical diagnosis for this condition. That does not mean empty nest syndrome is not a real condition that can be diagnosed by a therapist, social worker, or caregiver. Symptoms of empty nest syndrome to look for include: 

Being more sad than usual after a life-changing event, particularly one involving a change in living arrangements

Feeling distressed or easily aggravated

Crying easily

Experiencing depression

Suffering a loss of one’s meaning in life

Avoidance of social interaction or activities that were once enjoyable

Change in weight, either excessive weight loss or weight gain

If you are experiencing these symptoms in association with a change in your household, then continue reading to learn how to treat empty nest syndrome. Once you understand that you are suffering from empty nest syndrome, it puts a name on your feelings. This is a huge help in overcoming this condition. From there you will want to build up your social network. This helps you replace those social connections you lost, which lead to the condition. If you are an active senior, pick up old hobbies or start new activities, such as going to a senior centre, joining a community book club, or volunteering with a local organisation.

If you are struggling with health issues that prevent you from being active, or have become depressed, seek professional help through therapy or counselling. Counselling support can provide you with resources, such as reading materials or online support groups, that can benefit you. 

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Miles 4 Minds   Update


August 5th  2019 

Gary Head  has completed his 1.013km run  in aid of suicide awareness and mental health, having raised £ 5,876.00  plus gift aid a total of £ 7,061.51 a truly phenomenal achievement. 

Our Blog

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Surviving to Thriving...

April 11th 2019

1-1 counselling, group support and creative therapy  for adult survivors of abuse. 

No artistic skill necessary, the session invites creative expression and the exploration of choices. 

Access to Surviving to Thriving  available following an informal 1-1 introductory session. 

Please note creative therapy is not an art class.

Our Latest Blog Entry

Miles 4 Minds   


May 25th 2019

As many of us are looking forward to a summer of BBQs and beer gardens, Active Dorset's Operations Manager Gary Head is shaping up for the physical challenge of a lifetime.

Over the course of six weeks, Gary will be running the entire length of the coast from Minehead in Somerset to Sandbanks in Poole – a staggering distance of 1,013 km (630 miles) - at a pace of a half marathon every day. His goal is to raise £1,013 for each of the three Mind offices in Cornwall, Devon and Dorset as part of his 'Miles for Minds' run.

He is running in memory of his friend John Paul Childs, who took his own life in January 2018, and is hoping that his challenge will raise awareness of the importance of providing support for people struggling with their mental health.


"Losing a friend in such heartbreaking circumstances was difficult for everyone that knew Johnno," says Gary. "For me, mental health issues have added meaning because my own mother has lived with schizophrenia for most of her life.

"A big part of what we do at Active Dorset promotes the value of being active and how it can impact positively on a person's physical and mental health. I am really grateful to Active Dorset for allowing me to work part-time and remotely over the next few weeks to complete this challenge".


To further promote the links between physical and mental health, Gary is inviting people to join him at different points on his incredible journey, for as little or as long as they like.


 "I'll have friends and family joining me at various points along the route, and 'd welcome anyone who wants to join me walking or running along the coastal path,"

 he says.

To see how Gary is progressing, and to work out where you can join him, you can follow him on Twitter @miles_4_minds or his Facebook page (Miles for Minds). 

If you'd like to donate, go to https://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/MilesforMinds.

Reference : https://www.activedorset.org/latest-news/2019/05/gary-head-begins-miles-for-minds-challenge1 

Our Blog

An ongoing series of informational entries

January 5th 2019

Life can be unpredictable, are you struggling to cope?

If you feel you need to see a counsellor but are burdened by the prospect of weeks or sometimes months on a waiting list, i  offer fast track access to the counselling support you need.


Terms & conditions apply.

What is Abuse?

February 17th 2019

Abuse is always wrong and it can be very difficult to talk about . 

If you’re worried about abuse, find out what it is and who can help you. 


There are different types of abuse.

  • Physical: being hurt by someone 
  • Mental or emotional: being treated badly, such as consistently being ignored or criticised
  • Verbal: saying or shouting or writing horrible things
  • Neglect: not being looked after and kept healthy
  •  Sexual abuse: touched where you shouldn’t be or forced to take part in sexual activity

Abuse is often about power and the person who abuses you uses that power to get you to do things you don’t want to do. It is hurtful either mentally or physically. Sexual abuse includes being touched, kissed or forced to have sex against your will and often by someone older than you.

Abuse isn’t always carried out by a stranger and can be someone you know, which can make it feel hard to speak out about. Because they are known to you, if your family or others close to you don’t know about the abuse they will think it is safe to leave you with this person. This is why they need to know as soon as possible.

Abuse is always wrong and if you tell someone they can help to make it stop.

Why you must get help

Abuse is always wrong and must be stopped. Apart from being horrible while it is happening it can affect your life. Speaking out as soon as you can makes it less likely you will have problems later.

If you have been abused you may:

  • Be wary of adults
  • Find it hard to trust people
  • Have problems developing relationships
  • Have difficulty concentrating
  • Find that you are more irritable or emotional
  • Do worse at school
  • Have difficulties with trust entering sexual relationships in the future
  • Have low self-esteem, become depressed or anxious
  • Be vulnerable to self-harm

Having one or more of these issues isn’t necessarily the result of abuse. They can be caused by a number of things. But if you know you have suffered abuse you could talk to your GP who can spot if you are at risk of developing any of these problems and will be able to help you.


Where you can find help

Take the first step you need to tell someone. Start with your family but if the abuser is known to them you might want to speak to someone else you trust like a teacher or your GP. Even if your GP knows this person they will be able to help you and they won’t break your confidence.


If you are in immediate danger call 999.



Childline

www.childline.org.uk

If you're under 19 you can confidentially call, email or chat online about any problem big or small

Freephone 24h helpline: 0800 1111

Sign up for a childline account on the website to be able to message a counsellor anytime without using your email address

Chat 1:1 with an online advisor


Victim Support

www.victimsupport.org.uk

If you've witnessed or been a victim of a crime, you can talk to Victim Support on their free and confidential helpline.

Support line: 0808 1689 111

Our Blog

An ongoing series of informational entries

 Existential Crisis

June 6th, 2018

Emmy van Deurzen talks about 'Existential Crisis'.  

Existential therapy is a unique form of psychotherapy that looks to explore difficulties from a philosophical perspective, rather than taking a technique-based approach. Focusing on the human condition as a whole, existential therapy applauds human capacities and encourages individuals to take responsibility for their successes.